I've been putting off blogging for quite a while now.
It's not that there isn't any good stuff going on in my life - in fact, quite the opposite. I am in the season of the biggest joy and most substantial freedom that I have ever experienced, and this wonderful experience and love of life continues to grow deeper and stronger week-by-week, and I am so thankful that the Lord has willed my life in this direction and provided me opportunity to embrace this good and new life.
It's more the fact that what I write on here, while written for friends, can be read by anyone. Do I have a problem with the world knowing that God has given me an incredible, unprecedented (and certainly not temporal) joy? Not at all! I want to shout it from the roof tops. Jesus is alive! I am free! I'm abiding in love! It's incredible.
The reason that I've been reluctant to post is twofold. One is that typically when someone maintains a blog, it is expected that they chronicle the "big events" in their life, and the changing of "seasons"... This season began four or five months ago, and perhaps I was a bit scared that it was too good to be true. And as time went, joy and freedom increased, and the task of justifying this shift to whoever reads my blog became more and more daunting.
The second reason is that I did not come into this joy from a neutral standpoint. I was rescued and brought here from the most difficult period of my life, and to testify to his goodness I was unsure how much I would be required to post of that rough time. That's where the "anyone can read this" nature of blogs began to stifle me. I don't want to even think of how rough a season of life I was in, let alone share it with the masses.
So I think perhaps it is suffice to say that I was terribly lost, God seemed far, and I really had to endure by faith and not by sight, and in his grace and in his timing he rescued me... "he rescued me, because he delighted in me." (Psalm 18:19)
HE IS SO GOOD. And I am so thankful.
No comments:
Post a Comment